If the freedom of speech is taken away then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter.

- George Washington

Friday, 10 December 2010

Rejoice, I say, Rejoice

For lo, mine chariot which hath the wheels of the number four, and four is the number thereof, has passed its MoT. And the passing was not of the passing kind, but displeased Pharoah's minion, for it involved a failure for headlight aim, which the minion thereunto addressed himself with a screwdriver, and which thereby was transfigured into a pass. And there was also an advisory in the land, which was the advisory that the brake discs were not of the shiny type, but were becoming rusty as becomes metal things which have not the joy of regular use, and great was the lamentation of it. But this was advisory only and did not corrupt the passing nature of the testing of Pharoah.

Congregation: For yea, we are pleased that the LORD has been gracious unto us.

And lo, great was the weeping and gnashing of teeth in the land of trees, for this testing and the proof thereof caused the felling of many, for presented unto my eyes were six scrolls, and the scrolls were green and pink and yellow, and the scribings upon them were manifold:

  • Pass certificate in English and Welsh
  • Failure certificate for the headlights in English
  • Failure certificate for the headlights in Welsh
  • Advisory certificate for the rusty brake discs in English and Welsh
  • Emissions certificate in English and Welsh.
And lo, great was the joy of Richard of the tribe of Blog, for the LORD would now allow him to drive his chariot throughout the land, and not against the laws of Pharoah, who demandeth such scrolls or the driver of the chariot be cast into the darkness and fined many goats and cattle and sheep, yea, even unto the fourth generation.

Another happy car, today.

This, I can tell you, is a huge relief.

Memo to self: train as an MoT tester. Fifty big ones for 40 minutes' work. Not bad.

UPDATE: list of certificates corrected. Not quite as bad as I thought, when I actually got round to looking properly.


  1. Why do they need to issue certs in Welsh as standard?

  2. All public sector bodies, and most large private sector organisations, do bilingual documentation. I don't have a problem with that (being English in Wales, it ill behoves me to criticise) but if they can produce a bilingual pass sheet, I don't see the need for two fail sheets, one in each language. Or indeed fail sheets at all, if the problem was corrected during the test.

    Such is life here in the Celtic borderlands.

  3. Could we set this to music too?

  4. Got me holding my sides here Richard.


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