The Perils of Internet Translation

I'm beginning to regret posting a kit report on my recent torch purchase. It has attracted a large number of spam comments, all from the same Australian company, all advertising the virtues of Maglites, and all written in very bad English. I've reported the originator to Blogger, I have left foul and threatening messages on his own blog (one post, 18 months ago, with a comments thread as long as your arm, all saying the same thing: get lost), and I have deleted all the comments without publishing. As the post is over 14 days old, they all come for moderation anyway, so it's no problem.

The first comments were, I think, automatically generated, as the post specifically mentions 'Maglite', and Maglites are what he is selling. All were along the lines of "yes, that is good torch, but I like Maglite torches, they very robust are". But then one came in last night which I thought was written by a human, as it (however wierdly) refers to the context of the post (in a bike blog) as well as the product. The writer calls himself 'German' and the post reads like either bad English from a German, or good German badly auto-translated. I think it's rather charming:

I've ever pioneer the corner of Halfords where they donjon the multipacks of fasteners, washers, electrical connections and added much items to be an extremely multipurpose base. Plus, I do quite measure their slave division.That's an brilliant mullein...two of those strapped to the advance of my Kwak would belike improve dark travel no end!

But then it sort of rang a bell, and I went back to the original post. The first comment was from endemoniada_88:

I've always found the corner of Halfords where they keep the multipacks of fasteners, washers, electrical connections and other such items to be an extremely useful place. Plus, I do quite rate their tool section.

That's an impressive torch...two of those strapped to the front of my Kwak would probably improve night riding no end!

I prefer "belike improve dark travel" myself ...